A sister’s sacrifice is silent, but always there. You know how life has a way of throwing challenges at you when you least expect it? For me and my family, those challenges came early. When I was just 14, our mother, a brave woman who had battled asthma for many years, passed away. She left behind 7 children: 3 adults, 2 young adults, and 2 minors. My sister Mari and I were the minors. It wasn’t easy—losing a single mother to an illness. Asthma drained so much from her, but a sister’s sacrifice changed everything. My oldest sister, Lhyv Oakwomon (Oak for short), stood tall in the midst of that storm. She became much more than a sister; she became a protector overnight.
A sister’s’ love and sacrifice
Oak could have chosen an easier path. With 5 children of her own. Each of them demanding intense functional and emotional support. Yet she stepped up for me. My father was absent, and Oak became my guide, teacher, and protector. She shepherded me through the labyrinth of school, friendships, and adolescence. More than a sister, she embodied the roles of both father and mother, ensuring I had everything I needed—sacrificing pieces of her own life in the process. That’s how I understood a sister’s sacrifice.
So, how did a sister’s love make a difference?
To me, Oak had done something truly incredible: she finished rearing me, gave some serious tough love, and somehow managed to keep her sense of humor intact through it all. Today as an adult and looking back, I do not know how she did it. What a sacrifice she made, but she did it—and I’m forever grateful that she did. Don’t get me wrong it was tough. I had to grow up real fast. I had to grieve, finish high school and try to figure out whether college was going to be an option for me. So, I want to acknowledge Oak for that great sacrifice. So, tell me does your family have an Oak? I believe every family needs an Oak… sturdy, reliable, and just the right amount of “sarcastic” when life gets a little too serious! Who is the Oak in your life?
In His Grip – Kathryn
So, I asked Oak what she wanted the world to know about her, and here is that text. Tell me what you think?
A Personal Journey:
A sister’s sacrifice brings: feminism, spiritual growth, and a new identity
Like many from my generation (though I was born at the end of the Silent Generation, I most closely identify with Baby Boomers), I have been a social and political activist for most of my adult life. Similarly, my most influential interests include self-reflective spirituality, self-improvement, various emotional therapies, and above all, the pursuit of wisdom.
The focus of my activism shifted with the rise of Second Wave Feminism. During this time, I developed a new interest in the history of ideas—specifically, the origins of words and concepts that shape our beliefs and behaviors. By studying the social, political, and economic status of women, I fully embraced my autonomy as a human being. These incremental internal changes built upon what I had learned as a child: there are many paths to spiritual growth. Despite efforts to suppress knowledge of ancient Pagan beliefs, Feminist researchers uncovered pre-Abrahamic customs focused on the worship of Nature, embodied by the Mother Goddess. These steps were crucial in my journey towards understanding a sisters sacrifice for her own identity.
Choosing My Name: Lhyv Oakwomon
Drawing from my studies in non-classical spiritual practices, I followed the tradition of choosing a name between the ages of twenty-seven and thirty. After months of soul-searching and meditation, the name Lhyv Oakwomon chose me.
This choice did not happen in isolation. Many Feminists adopted names reflecting the natural world and our connection to it. My name perfectly embodies my values and character. It means “she who grows against gravity”—in my case, against the gravity of racism and sexism—self-sufficient and independent. Like the live oak tree, which grows its branches straight out from the trunk, I strive to grow against the forces that try to weigh me down. The tree’s vast root system, which can span over sixty feet in circumference and reach a height of a hundred feet, symbolizes my commitment to inner growth and becoming a better person.
Now it’s your turn. Tell me, do you have an Oak in your life? Let me know. It could be a family member, a neighbor, or even a friend. Who is your Oak? And have you witnessed a sister’s sacrifice in your own life?
